ACCEPT THE EMPLOYEE’S OFFER

Steven Cesare, Ph.D.

A successful business owner from Michigan, called me the other day to share her reflections about a recent incident she had with a current Manager. From what I was told, the business owner and the Manager have had a “hot and cold” relationship over the past year. While the “hot” times have yielded unmitigated success, smiles, and celebration, the “cold” times have produced hurtful feelings, disappointment, and tacit caution. Despite intermittent achievement, the tenured Manager, either by intent or accident, periodically behaves in a manner that conflicts with the desired culture the business owner is trying to cultivate.

The recent coaching session centered on the Manager once again, leaving work early and taking whole days off from work, without garnering a-priori approval from the business owner. At first glance, one openly wonders why an experienced Manager would make such a blatant decision to violate a fundamental company policy? Disrespect, defiance, entitlement, forgetfulness?

The motivation is irrelevant.

A policy violation occurred, and per the company culture, accountability must be called to task.

The meeting in question began with a simple statement of facts and inquiry, trying to identify the rationale and potential extenuating circumstances, related to the Manager’s absences. In response, the Manager’s tone quickly accelerated from being professionally calm, then becoming emotionally immature, ultimately residing in a state of being defiantly indignant.

The Manager’s puerile indignation culminated in his statement that “Maybe I should not work here anymore.” An unexpected statement, that immediately befuddled the erstwhile savvy business owner. At that point, the business owner and Manager agreed on an impasse, with a follow-up meeting scheduled for some time during the following week.

The business owner asked my opinion about his comment and how she should have responded.

Without hesitation, I said: “Accept the employee’s offer to resign his position!”

In my professional opinion, if an employee resorts to any absolutist comment regarding his/her employment status, it is more often than not, a strategic and clandestine ultimatum seeking selfish negotiation. Make no mistake, that employee is not part of the team, the culture, or the future.

Responsible people seldom say things about which they have not given extensive consideration. Assuming the Manager is a responsible person, such a statement and its related condition (i.e., resignation), have likely been on his mind for quite some time. Rather than discussing certain policies, positions, and decisions in a composed manner with the business owner during their regularly-scheduled weekly one-on-one sessions, the allegedly responsible Manager was ostensibly triggered by the attendance violations and responded with a self-serving lure to enhance his employment status, veiled as personal frustration focusing on the business owner’s unfairness or the company’s perceived bureaucratic practices.

As a capitalist, that’s called a “Power Play,” with the Manager attempting to seductively redefine the zero-sum game of functional control between the Manager and the business owner. Don’t be naïve! Any time a business owner surrenders any aspect of power to an employee, customer, vendor, or business partner, it is seldom retrieved by the business owner to the same degree as when it was initially conceded.

Responsible employees, those whom you trust, can build around, and believe in, do not make impetuous demands on their organization; thus, they must be retained. However, other employees who consciously seek their own self-interest at the company’s expense by alleging guilt, unfairness, or discrimination against their business owner, should be allowed to resign their position. They do not and will not ever respect you.

Would you really trust that type of employee again?

You know the truth: Accept the employee’s offer to resign his position, immediately!

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